A Thought about Boogie-men in the closet

When I was little my sister made me terrified of the boogie man who had taken up residence under my bed and in my closet.  I think it all started because she had to share a small bedroom with me and didn’t want me going into ‘her’ closet. [I also think she had the ‘middle child syndrome’ but that’s another story], so she conjured up the boogie man to keep me away from her things.  This boogie man was a merciless beast that sat in wait to defend it’s territory against any pint sized trespasser.  Now, although I never saw this creature I was always aware that it was there just waiting to pounce.

Each night I would take a running jump from the bedroom door to the end of the bed which was easily 4-5ft away [I’m surprised I didn’t grow up to be a sprinter]. The closet was checked and then double checked before it was securely shut, the hall light was left on and every stuffed animal I had surrounded me in the bed for protection. I would lay awake in fear for hours every night. Years later when my sister moved out and I finally had the room to myself, the fear still remained.

I think many people suffer from boogie-men in their closets. Boogie-men that if left unattended can sometimes have great control over our lives. It may be a boogie-man of past mis-treatments or maybe memories of past failures that haunt or accuse us.  Our self image can be very much shaped by our past, by the fears and insecurities that pop up and threaten our stability.  All this contributes to who we eventually become.
Have you been praised and encouraged through life?  Or maybe you’ve been relentlessly criticized. Do you live in fear?  Has your past made you strong and confident?  Or has it left you weak and helpless, afraid of all that inhabits your closet? Most people have a mixture of both and it all contributes to how you perceive yourself.

A marriage partner can either help to clean out those closets and cause a spouse to become more courageous, or they can have the opposite effect and can become a source that fans the flames and increases the fear.  That dark scary spot in the closet can either end up consuming the entire house, or, if it is handled properly, can in time become just another very useful room.
Visiting the scarey closets of your own life become easier and not as frightening if you have someone who gives you the self confidence and reassurance to stand up and overcome; someone who will walk beside you and hold on to you tightly when the boogie man threatens to take over.
Isn't that what marriage and family is all about? Sometimes I think we just don't understand the potential we have over one another, especially those we love, to empower.....but also to destroy.

Oh by the way, when I was young I sometimes wet the bed, so revenge had it’s own way of dealing with my sister when she was mean to me!